Archive for the ‘Family & Friends’ Category

Sweet, Innocent Babies

Tuesday, September 7th, 2010

motherandbaby

In a couple of weeks, I get to see our daughter, son, daughter-in-law and ARIELLE, our grand daughter.  What is it about grandchildren that turn a person into mush?  I want to hold her close, and eat her face.  I think that’s the Italian side coming out.  The kids are “grown ups”, or so I let them believe.  But babies are so vulnerable, and sweet and innocent.  The urge to apologize to her for the situation in the world is very strong.  I mean I know I’m not responsible for most of it, but I haven’t fixed it either.

 

Where to start, though?  If only folks could be more logical, and stop destructive hobbies like blowing up one another.  It’s messy, painful and only leads to more people getting blown up.  It’s been thousands of years, guys.  You are never going to get everyone to believe as you do.  If the way others worship disturbs you, stay within your own group (area of the world, country).  If not, the only thing we can count on is more conflict, more waste and more funerals…

 

Now that I’ve depressed myself, I’m going to bed.  Hopefully to dream of my favorite little one!

Summers End

Tuesday, August 31st, 2010

Well folks, there’s no way to avoid it.  August is coming to an end and with it the true summery feel of Summer.  The stores are breaking out the cool weather clothes and school supplies are cluttering store shelves.  Kids are beginning to wear that haunted look that says ” Shit, it can’t be that time already!!!”  Around here school opens in about a week or so, and harried Mothers are counting the minutes.

 

It’s not that we don’t love our kids.  But by this time of year the at home Moms are tired of chauffeuring, refereeing, devising entertainment and trying to get their offspring to hold up their  own  end of the deal,  whatever that might be.  Working Moms have had it with sitters, unsettled schedules and the ever present “Mom guilt” that often accompanies the long summer days.  We’re a four season area, and while many wish summer would last longer, countless women are in let’s get on with it mode.

 

We do have one “child” finishing her last semester before grad school.  But she, along with  her brother, sister in law and niece are a thousand miles away.  So that leaves me without any back-to-school obligations these days, except for my own odd little September ritual.  Despite the fact I haven’t been in school since graduating High School in 1973, each Autumn I purchase myself new pencils, pens and notebook.  It makes me feel ready.  For what, I’m uncertain.  But if one of my old teachers should show up, I’m prepared to take notes.  Good grief.

 

 

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Contemplating Sorrows

Friday, August 27th, 2010

 

Maybe it’s the gloomy weather, but I’ve been contemplating sorrows the last few days.  We all have them; large and small, past and present.  For some of us, it’s ill health.  Or worse, health problems with our children or other loved ones.  Financial troubles, broken hearts, family estrangements and mental health difficulties, the list goes on and on.  So what do we do?  One can turn to alcohol or other substances.  REALLY bad idea, as tempting as it can be.  There’s the old Anglo-Saxon “stiff upper lip” attitude, to just tough it out.  I find this works best along with turning to one’s support system.  Talking with sisters, friends, cousins, aunts and other women folk just to sort things out can bring great relief.  Bitching, confiding, venting or even tears can act as a great safety valve. 

 

The sun eventually returns, both literally and figuratively.  So for me, I’m going to try and stop dwelling on things I can’t change, and losses that cannot be recovered.  Concentrate instead on the many positives in my life.  Like venting on this blog, and knowing that I can always turn to my emergency chocolate bar if need be…

 

Men

Tuesday, August 24th, 2010

 

I’ve been thinking about men lately, there are many in my life.  A husband, son, brother as well as brothers-in-law, nephews and friends.  But they do have their peculiarities, don’t they?  The majority of them seem as though they’d rather be audited by the IRS than have a meaningful discussion with the woman in their life.  Not all of them, of course.  But many of them do their best to avoid the dreaded phrase “let’s talk”, hearing instead “I’m going to put your head in a vise and twist the handle really hard”.  Are we women really that intimidating?

 

And what is it with them and breasts, anyway?  I understand that to a hetero guy they are an interesting secondary sex characteristic, and thus attractive.  But good grief!!  From about 4th or 5th grade they become obsessed, and it only comes to an end post mortem.  They have all sorts of methods.  Those with easily annoyed women folk master the sideways glance.  Then there are those like my husband, who just look.  For that I’m grateful.  It means he’s still among the living, and at least he doesn’t drool.  Then there are the over exuberant, or just plain obnoxious.  Their eyes pop and wolf whistles and other odd noises abound.  Having had the experience several times when I was a lot younger, it’s not pretty.  I don’t know a single girl whoever had that experience and said to herself “that guy is SO HOT, let me give him my phone number”.

 

But hey, ladies.  They are the only opposite sex we have.  So we learn to deal with it.  And then years later, to deal with the fact it probably won’t happen anymore.  Talk about mixed feelings!  Part of the circle of life, and all.  So before I break into a song from THE LION KING, I think I’ll just say goodnight!

 

 

 

Three Weeks in an Antique Bus

Tuesday, August 17th, 2010

 

I’ve got this three week trip across our fabulous country dancing around in my head.  There is so much, it’s difficult to know where to begin.  Never having been further west than Wisconsin, there was a great deal I hadn’t seen or experienced.  Huge mountains and desolate prairie.  Winding rivers such a deep shade of blue that it steals one’s breath.  Mount Rushmore and the in-progress gigantic Crazy Horse Monument.  Yellowstone, and watching hundreds of bison cross the road in no hurry, and with great nonchalance.  The museum of the Massacre at Wounded Knee.  Big sky and cowboy boots on fence posts around homes and ranches.  Towns with populations of 28, while one with 1500 citizens is a “city”.  Mount St. Helen’s and the stripped trees still floating in Spirit Lake 30 years later.  Landscape that can go from flat, brown and sagebrush covered to green and mountainous in the blink of an eye.

 

I feel quite humbled, and grateful to have been able to experience it all.  Mother nature always puts one in one’s place, doesn’t she?  Speaking with the “locals” is always one of the pleasures of travel.  I’ve been called “ma’am” by a cowboy (a brief instant of wishing I was 20 years younger and single) and purchased a handmade beaded necklace from an elderly Indian of immense dignity at the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. Felt collective guilt while driving through miles of Reservation land, and seeing the plight of Native Americans.  Watched children play amidst a garden of flowers that had to be seen to be believed.  Saw the awe in the faces of my country men and women as they gloried in the same sights that were overwhelming me.  I also ate way too much and have expended my calorie allowance through Thanksgiving.  There’s always a down side, isn’t there?

 

Although it was close once or twice, I didn’t melt.  I learned you can spend three weeks traveling in an antique bus with friends and still be friends upon homecoming.  Realized that clothing disappears from suitcases much as it does from the dryer at home, and that I have a “Jersey” accent.  The only hamburgers you can get out west are tortured into seared and weathered hockey pucks.  No such thing as medium, let alone rare.  Having met our daughter for the last 6 days of the trip, I was reminded that she and her father are funny together, and a pleasure to watch.  Although I could have done without that one lady’s room moment with Kate.  The one where we entered a two stall bathroom with one stall occupied.  She heads for the empty perch and pounds on the other door on the way past.  Leaving me to explain to the woman that it wasn’t ME, but my daughter being amusing.  Good grief.

 

A wonderful time awaits me in September as well.  I get a few days down south, visiting our son, daughter-in-law, daughter  AND our wonderful Arielle, who is growing in leaps and bounds. I cannot wait to wrap my arms around her, and catch up with her life.  Pure heaven!  So good night and the best to all….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Circle of Life

Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010

 

With Marian’s new Grandmother status, the circle of life and its’ continuity has been on my mind a lot.  It’s really amazing, isn’t it? The birth of a baby?  To first see your children, then your grandchildren–each with part of yourself in them–born, grow and mature, to one day have children of their own?  There is something very comforting to me about that continuing cycle.  And very empowering–knowing that even after you and I are long gone, we live on in perpetuity.

 

I’ve always believed that child rearing is undoubtedly the single most important job in the world.  Simultaneously scary and wonderful, what could possibly be more important than molding the minds of the future?

The Blessings of Old Friends

Thursday, July 22nd, 2010

I’ve always believed “old” friends are a blessing.  They hold a bit of our past history, knew us back when and liked us anyway!  Got together with one this past Friday night.  She and her husband came north for a family wedding to good old “Jersey”,  as the foreigners say.  I moved half way through High School (still recovering from the trauma) and Grover was the first person who actually spoke to me in the new school.  Good grief, that meant a lot!

 

She was Grover to my Mahoney because neither one of us thought our first names were “cool” I guess.  We hung out together and did some stuff I still wouldn’t want to explain to my parents — or kids for that matter.  But here we are, both married parents of two grown kids, and Grandmothers too.  She’s got a grandson and daughter, and we’ve got our Arielle.  Our husbands kindly sat and listened over dinner to our trip down memory lane, and we realized we’ve been friends for 38 years.  No easy task, since we are only around 35.

 

Anyway, it’s always wonderful to spend time with someone who remembers what one looked like at age 17…

 

Good Night, and be well to all!

 

Temporary Insanity

Monday, July 19th, 2010

 

In the not too distant future, you’re going to be hearing a different voice on this blog.  My BFF and 41 year partner in crime, Colleen,  will be posting for a time.  She’s had some very different life experiences;  as I’ve told her more than once, she’s had an interesting life.  As for me, I’m going to be going to Vancouver.  In a 1930 Model A bus.  We’re going with two other couples, and my husband will be the bus driver.  Apparently menopause causes a type of temporary insanity.  That’s the only reason I can come up with for agreeing to ride cross country in July without air conditioning.  I’ll be back eventually, if I don’t melt…

Battle of the Wallet

Monday, July 12th, 2010

 

Well, the battle of the wallet between my husband and myself is over.  I’m still not sure who won this round, ladies.  It was literally about a wallet — not money.  Three Father’s Days ago, I gave him a new wallet.  His old one was worn out, falling apart.  The leather had lost much of it’s color, and there were strings hanging from it.  No “recycler” of any type would have rescued it from a garbage can.  I mean, I thought it was a nice gift. Certainly no evil intent.  There it sat for two years, right next to where he puts his wallet at the end of the day.  Looking pristine, and very lonely.

 

I tried pointing out how nice the new one was.  For heaven’s sake, I even wore it for weeks in my own back pocket to “break it in” for him when he told me why he “hates new wallets”.  (Is he spoiled or what?)  Then I tried pouting and being hurt.  Neither work well in long term relationships.  For the last couple of months I told him repeatedly that I was getting the feeling something “awful” was going to happen to the old wallet.  No reaction from the man.  Time to pull out the big guns.

 

When we came back from visiting our Grand daughter for the first time, I told him that she confided in me that she’s very embarrassed by the wallet her Grandpa carries.  Hey, what can I say?  She was very advanced at two weeks old.  That got a smirking smile from him, but that was it.  So one night I got out the scissors, markers and stickers.  In the morning he found it colorfully drawn upon, slashed and decorated with Disney’s Little Mermaid and friends.  I kid you not, he carried it for another week and a half before FINALLY relenting.  But in thinking back, I believe what got through to him ultimately was my threat to throw out the new wallet.  I told him what I’d paid for it, you see.

 

So in the marital score keeping department, I’d have to call that one pretty close to a draw.  Time to think about what to get him for next Father’s Day…

 

Life After Divorce

Friday, June 25th, 2010

 

I’ve got particularly happy news.  One of the women folk is seeing a nice guy!  This is especially wonderful since she suffered a divorce that was not of her choosing several years ago.  Love can’t be turned off like a faucet, especially with us ladies.  While her broken heart is not mended, she’s out there and enjoying life far more than she has in some time.  It’s a huge step,  and I’m greatly enjoying seeing her do more than put one foot in front of the other on a daily basis.  I salute you, kiddo!

 

 

Shout out to grand daughter Arielle:  Do you miss me as much as I miss you, little one?